+ I lost 4kg, - I hate everyone pt 2
written on Wednesday, 6 May 2015 @ 17:23 ♡
So first of all the good news; I lost 4kg!! It took me 4 weeks which is actually a long time concidering the fact that I once lost 7kg in 3 weeks but then again this time I'm doing it the healthy way and I'm not doing any work-outs at all. I simply try to eat less than 1200kcal per day and walk or ride my bike everywhere.
Now let's talk about the not so pretty things.
To be honest, I always expected to find friends I'm going to have for the rest of my life in university but right now it doesn't seem like it. Everyone I hang out with is super friendly and nice but I just can't seem to really connect w anyone which I didn't mind at first, but now it turnes out that my best friend M is going to leave to study in a different city in September, meaning I'll be all by myself..
Also there is this guy. He's taken but I'm kind of getting interested. I don't know if I'm getting interested in a romantic way or just a friend kinda way but I just find myself wanting to talk to him a lot all the time and it's really fucking frustrating.
And then there's this other guy from my class who I kind of want to hook up with but then again he seems to be VERY experienced to say the least, and I don't know if I could handle the pressure since I'm over here like
Now let's talk about the not so pretty things.
To be honest, I always expected to find friends I'm going to have for the rest of my life in university but right now it doesn't seem like it. Everyone I hang out with is super friendly and nice but I just can't seem to really connect w anyone which I didn't mind at first, but now it turnes out that my best friend M is going to leave to study in a different city in September, meaning I'll be all by myself..
And then there's this other guy from my class who I kind of want to hook up with but then again he seems to be VERY experienced to say the least, and I don't know if I could handle the pressure since I'm over here like
what is a boy....?
Right..
So there is that..
Another thing bothering me is the fact that (I just spilled coke all over my table I think that's a sign from god that he isn't very pleased with me using that picture of Holy Maria to describe my sex life) the guy who broke my heart is happy. I just saw him and his girlfriend going to Zara and god, just looking at them made me want to throw up.
I got back my SHERLOCK DVDs and everything after messaging him frist (!!) and when we met up, he fucking showed up 17 minutes too late. 17 fucking minutes.
I texted him "where r u" and he was all "ohh u r already here?? haha ok im on my way" WHAT THE FUCK I CLEARLY FUCKING SAID LET'S MEET AT 6PM WHAT MADE U THINK THAT BY 6PM I MEAN 6:17???????????? Goddamnit.
And then he forgot to bring my bag.
You know, I originally planned to just get my stuff and leave quietly without starting to talk about my life and everything but when he fucked up again so I decided to fucking gloat about everything that happened lately. Fuck you. I told him about my appartement, my hamster, uni, the party I was visiting after etc etc. and then I was like "ok I g2g I'm meeting someone bye" and left.
Oh, and I forgot to mention that he didn't apologise for being late :)
Just writing about this makes me so angry and mad god I want to rip his head off!!! I don't understand what I liked about him. Why did I think this boy was so special?? I don't understand. What the fuck??
So yeah, I've been busy.
Labels: angry, friends, life, life lesson, love, love life, random, regular, sad, university, weight loss journey
Hypocrite
written on Friday, 8 November 2013 @ 21:46 ♡
I used to be extremely anti alcohol and everything but now... I actually quite enjoyed being drunk when we were in England. Everything was funnier and I had such a great time.
My closest friends on the other hand don't drink at all and we always look down on those people who brag about being drunk etc. but in the end, I am not that different.
Next month, a friend of ours is throwing a huge party and almost everyone in my year is invited, including me and said friends. I really want to go and have fun and yes, also get drunk, but my friends probably won't approve and think badly about me, also because I always claim to not like drinking that much. JFC what the fuck is wrong with me?!?!! I know I sound incredibly ignorant right now, but I hope they will be leaving the party early... I am a horrible person.
Monday,
written on Saturday, 17 August 2013 @ 23:22 ♡
School starts on monday.
I' am not ready for this.
During my six weeks of vacation I literally did NOTHING for school which is really fucking bad considering the fact that my report card wasn't that satisfyng...
I feel exhausted just thinking about monday. I'll be seeing all those people again which I successfully avoided the past weeks and since it's my last year, shit's gettin real now. UGGGGHHH I don't want to see all those girls who pretend to be friends with each other again.I just want to go to uni already where no one gives a flying fuck about what you look like.
I am feeling really down right now. I have no idea where this feeling is comming from but it frickin sucks. Maybe it's because suMMER JUST DOESN'T FUCKING END I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF SWEATING MY ASS OFF EVERWHERE I GO or because I'm afraid of seeing my crush again..
Worth mentioning is maybe also that today, once again, I realized I am a horrible person. I diched my friend and told her I didn't have time to hang out because I need to clean up, which wasn't completely a lie since I REALLY had to do that but well.. the only things I did today were buying food and dying my hair (there is hair dye all over the wall right now thank god my mum isn't home this week i need to paint it over or sth idk hlep). I think she's pissed which is understandable but I mean, it's nothing personal. I just need some alone time before school starts since last week I was in spain with my parents who I saw 24/7... literally!!
I am so exhausted........................ can someone just stop time for a few days???? ha ha .. ha..